Sunday, January 14, 2018

Where My Shoes Take Me



Welcome to my world.
Try as I may, I am reminded that I must be real.
Real.
I want to be the poster child for "everything is rainbows and roses,"
but I'm not.
My world can be messy, and not always in order.
I try so hard to straighten things out!


Who am I trying to kid?
Just when I think I may be making some headway,
life happens again and I'm on my face
before my Maker.


This, my friends is a true story.
I am a rule follower and try to do things right, try to say the right things,
pray the right way.....wear a smile and tie my shoe laces so they don't come untied.
As hard as I try, I am learning.....


This was my morning.
I looked outside and saw fresh snow!
Perfect!
I love snow.
I don't know why I thought the boots I chose would work,
but I did.
Surely, it wasn't that slippery.
I made my way to my vehicle - walking gingerly on the snow covered grass to avoid walking on the
driveway (hello....)
I slipped a little when I stepped onto the driveway but, hey, I was getting in my  vehicle.
It would be all right.
I was going to church.
How long of a walk could it possibly be from my parking place to the front door?


I wasn't early by any means, and the parking lot was full.
I drove and looked....nothing close.
Snow and ice covered every area near and far.
I parked and looked at the distance I'd have to walk to get to the church.
Wisdom told me I had made a mistake by wearing the slickest boots in the closet.
It was not going to happen.


I drove back home and slid all the way up the driveway, holding on to vehicles and branches so I wouldn't fall. (I confess, I thought maybe it would be easier to take those boots off and walk in my stocking feet through the snow! I opted not to do that.)
Those boots were not the best idea.


By the time I changed into my trusty hiking boots (yes, I live in Colorado where it's ok to wear jeans and hiking boots to church) it was too late for some churches, and the right time for others.


So, I made my way to the church that was just about to start.
I parked and heard the faint sound of singing coming from inside the building.
Peace filled my heart.
I entered and found a seat in the back.


"Grace flows down and covers me...."
His presence touched my heart, and tears fell,
I stood and could not stop the tears.
 It was His grace, His love...like a flood, it covered me.


The message?
"How to Survive the coming storm."
How does He know just what I need to hear?
"Maybe some of you are experiencing a storm and need encouragement..."
I thought I was doing so well, but that was me.
"Rest in Him...."


Sometimes I get caught up in trying to do things myself, so God will
love me, so He will move on my behalf.
I worry, and fret that I have to do something to earn his miracles, his grace.


If I follow the right formula and pray the right prayers, and say the right words, I will get the results I desire.
I wear myself out trying to please my Father.
It's that legalistic part of my background that pops up when things go 'wrong' or are hard in life....
I confess, sometimes my first thought is, "What did I do wrong...."


I'm a hard nut to crack sometimes (haha, right?) but, thankfully, my Father is patient with me.


This weekend I watched The Shack again.
I needed that.
My Papa loves me...Holy Spirit comforts me, Jesus loves and walks with me.
I may not be perfect or even near perfect, but love is mine.
I have never been left alone, not ever, even at my lowest.


Today, my slippery boots didn't work, but my hiking boots took me where I needed to be.
"Amazing grace comes falling down."


This weekend I grabbed onto the blessings He sent.
A rose from a blue star mom friend.
A gold star mom friend sent me a picture of a heart shape she saw on the side of a mountain.
Another gold star mom friend shared a picture of a pendant that reminded her of me - there was a heart in the middle of the pendant.
I got a call from my gold star mom friend who knows too well what it means to be on this journey and that trusting God is the only way.
Sometimes the hardness of a day can cast shadows, but I don't want to miss his blessings.
I chatted with a special writer friend, and visited with my daughter.
My husband gave me hugs and understanding.


Lord, You are good.
You send sparks of joy in the hard times to let me know you are there.
When things are hard, you know it.
When I need to climb up on your lap, you always have time.
You whsiper words of encouragement in my heart...."Keep on fighting the good fight. It's ok. Rest in me."
Sometimes I know fighting the good fight is just resting in you and not stressing myself out.
You are my solid Rock. You are the one I need to look to.
I know sometimes I look at what is around me and it all gets so big. You whisper, "I am here - look at me. I'm the greater one."
Lord, you know the battles are real, but that is why you came.
You are bigger than any battle we face.
Thank you for being faithful.
Thank you for carrying me when times are tough, and for giving me strength and filling me with joy in the midst of it all.                                                                                                                

Thank you for taking my shoes where I needed to be today.
Thank you for your grace, your love that covers me,
covers me like a warm blanket.
Thank you for loving me, just because you do.