I can't stand alone on any given day.
Abba Father is my strength everyday.
Yet, there are still times ....
A few days ago, I had a more difficult day.
It's February and other things, and it's just been hard.
I was talking to Abba Father and said,
Sometimes I don't feel you near!
That evening I was thinking about a way to verbalize how I was feeling.
I told my listening husband,
It's like that poem, Footprints.
I've been feeling like the person who says, "Where were you God, in those difficult
times. I see there is only one set of footprints during the toughest times." I'm paraphrasing.
God looks at me and says, "One set of footrpints, you say? Well, the reason is, during those very tough times I was carrying you."
I know He carries me, but sometimes he's so quiet when he does it.
He doesn't need to be.
I'm crying and saying things.
I'm sure not being quiet as I chat away.
My heart is heavy, things are tough, you know?
I may even be quoting his Word to him - Lord, you're my Shepherd.
I lack nothing...
Yes, things like that.
There are days when I say, I need some life poured into me.
Like invisible life-giving Gatorade.
I'm drained and tired from trying.
Yesterday I had no energy.
None.
I've found this happens after going to a funeral (and I had been to one a couple days ago.)
It takes a lot out of me.
Just a fact.
I prayed a bit.
I rested.
I'm one who tries to push herself, and tell myself, you've got to do, go, don't stop.
But, sometimes I just have to stop.
After a full, long night's rest I woke up
still drained.
I watched Doctor David Jeremiah.
I really didn't want to, but I did.
He was talking about how God loves me.
Yes, me.
He has unreasonable love for me.
As I listened, I felt a little lighter.
If He loves me, He knows right where I am.
If He loves me, won't He take care of all that concerns me?
If He loves me, won't He continue to be faithful?
If He loves me, well, He loves me.
Just the way I am.
I got dressed and went to church.
I sat down, and soon, a young family sat next to me.
Their little four month old baby boy bounced into my arms, and that's
all it took.
The sweetness of a baby.
Thank you God.
He loves me.
He knows I love babies.
After church I spoke to two new Marines, fresh out of boot camp.
Two young men, standing tall like Marines do, speaking with such respect,
like Marines do, dressed sharp and neat - like Marines.
Humble from all they went through in boot camp to form them into the
Few The Proud.
Thank you God.
He loves me.
He knows I am a Marine mom forever.
It blessed me to hear their stories, to see the high and tights that I remember so well.
My husband came home with a bouquet of flowers - no not for Valentine's Day.
Thank you God.
He loves me...and so does my husband.
God and he know I love roses and hydrangeas.
My husband took me to a Valentine's lunch.
Crab legs and prime rib, along with Bananas Foster...
Thank you God, for the good food, and for the lady who asked
about the dog tags I was wearing.
I got to tell her about Caleb.
This afternoon I chatted with a special Gold Star mom, friend
whose son will be gone from this world, 7 years tomorrow.
Caleb's is coming soon.
We chatted.
We are there for each other, even if we live states apart.
Oh! I forgot something important.
I visited with a friend this morning and talked about heaven,
and how wonderful it will be.
We will be his bride.
We will be beautiful.
After church, as we were walking out, the organ was playing.
A button was pushed is my understanding, and
it started playing the Bridal Chorus.
I had to smile.
God was reminding me....
there is coming a day.
I am thankful.
I am mindful of God's love.
I am thankful for the one set of footprints, because I know he's carrying
me, whether I feel it or not.
You know,
If I stop, and look around,
sometimes I can tell.
